Most Painful Memory

A few questions lingered after Twitter Tuesday. Yesterday's post about Superstitions in Eve was one. Another was from @tanjala14 who wondered what my most painful memory from inside Eve Online might be. I had to clarify if he meant "outside or inside" the game, since I have some pretty damn horrible memories from outside the game to choose from. But we won't talk about those today.

Of all the bad things that have happened to me over the past 12+ years, from being betrayed by CVA twice, to getting kicked from Tuskers (and the ensuing drama that caused), to being threatened by a legit ex-con, being dox'd several times, publicly called a "piece of shit" by Mittens, kicked from Muppet Ninjas after one day.. it's a long list. But, having said that, there is one incident that stands out amongst them all. One incident that remains a head-scratcher and caused ripples that still resonate today. (Or at least as recently as this time last year)

Around March 2nd of last year, this, among other things, was said in local:

AM > you are nothing rixx, let me remind you
AM > anyone worth a damn in this game
AM > knows you are terrible
AM > and a total fraud

Let's rewind back to the early days of Stay Frosty. Forming a new Pirate Corporation, lots of new people coming onboard, tension with the Tuskers in Hevrice local. I needed leaders so I started naming Directors. Many of those early Directors are still with us in-game, or still hang around with us on Discord. Except one. One day this one decided to kill a blue. For no good reason. So I stripped their roles, told them to refund the cost of the kill, and apologize to the pilot. First warning. This they did and their roles were returned to them. Pretty typical internal drama, nothing to worry about.

Except that wasn't enough for them. They recruited two others from inside our young group, took over our Teamspeak server, copied our forums and posted them publicly on Pastebin, and then proceeded to try and bring down the Corporation. When this failed to work, they left and joined Tuskers. Constantly bad mouthing us in local, refusing to engage, and generally being a pita.

Again, sorta normal Corp level drama. Unfortunate, but not insane.

Except it got worse. And it never seemed to end. Eve mails, real world emails, this continued until it started to cross the line into stalking territory. In fact, it got so bad that when my Wife and I went to Fanfest in 2015 we contacted CCP and local Police because we were concerned this person might show up. They didn't. Thankfully.

I'm leaving a lot out of this account on purpose. In fact, I've previously removed a number of old posts about this person in the hopes that it would help put this all in the past. I've also refrained from using their in-game character name for the same reasons. According to their killboard they seem to have gone inactive since the middle of last year, so that is some good news.

To this day I remain confused about why this person has so much hate for me specifically. From all accounts, they don't do this to anyone else in Eve. Just lucky old me. But yes, there is another side to this game. And some people have a difficult time keeping what happens in-game in the proper context. Most of us don't. But some do. Over the years I've attracted more than my fair share of them, but I suppose it comes with the territory.

But even after all of that, I truly wish them peace and maturity. Even after all of the drama surrounding those days, the CEO of Tuskers and I made peace with each other. And I have good in-game relations with many pilots in that Corporation. And I could say the same for many other groups inside and outside of Eve. So I have no grudge against this person either.

But that incident remains one of the most painful. And one I will never forget.