Just to be clear

This blog has always been, and always will be, a reflection of what I am thinking, doing and experiencing in EVE at the time I write the post you are reading.  There are threads of thought that span years, months and sometimes, only hours.  In my own humble opinion, that is one of the most important things about a blog.  It evolves, just as we all do.

Despite what I wrote yesterday, which was the truth, let's be clear about something. I love EVE. I don't expect that will ever change. Mostly I love the IDEA of Eve, more than the reality. That has also, always been true. Whenever I undock I still get that same overwhelming sensation of how great the experience is going to be. Sometimes it lives up to that expectation, but more often than not, it doesn't.

This goes even further into what I said a while ago about putting the blog on hold. Going out of business. At the moment I wrote that post I meant every word. My life was chaos at the time I wrote that. My business of ten years had just closed, I was without a job and I had no way of knowing what the future held for myself and my family. Without going into details, I could have easily been run out of town on a rail. I could have lost everything. Everything.

That hasn't happened yet. But much remains to be resolved. 

Into this mix of current events, Eve is a small part. But an on-going part and one that I don't plan of giving up. It creates frustrations, sure. But it always has. I am an unsettled wanderer in the universe of New Eden. I don't stay planted, or at least I haven't. I've moved from one side of the map to the other, looking for challenges and good fights. I don't expect that to stop anytime soon. If ever.

But for now, Eve takes a back seat to the rest. And unlike the past, when I would pick up on a whim and head off in some other direction, for now I'm staying put. Until the rest of my life gets settled at the very least. And maybe even after that.

If I've learned ONE thing about Eve over the past four years it is this - the game gives back what you put in. And my current frustration derives mostly from not being able to put anything in.

That will change over time. Everything does.