The Rants of a Madman!!

RJ's Aurum purchased vanity item, limited supplies!
This morning, having recently returned from being out-of-town on business, my inbox was all flashy and blinky.  Wading through the fan mail, the desperate pleading of sexually frustrated women, the offers of the planet-born to name their first son after me and things like that, I happened upon this email:

Hi There

I'm a diplomat with the Electus Matari Alliance. We are an NRDS anti-pirate alliance. You have formed an alliance with the Black Sail Anarchists and The Corporation of Noble Sentinments. I'm going to go out on a limb here and assume that you're pirates too. As such we'll be setting your alliance -5 for piracy. This is a notification mail only. No action is required on your part.

Have a nice day
[Name removed cause I don't remember it]

I just want to take a moment to set the record straight.  We ARE NOT PIRATES!  We are simply misunderstood freedom fighters that have been illegally labeled "criminals" by the dominating, elitist pig nations of the Empire States!  Forced to live our lives in so-called "low-security" space by the same corporate nation-states that strive to control all aspects of our lives.  We will not be controlled!  We are bound and determined to see injustice and slavery and all sorts of nasty, illegal stuff like that, corrected by any means necessary - including the regrettable use of force, intimidation, secret spais, bad jokes in local, and incredibly sexy trophy wives!

Grr.  No one puts Rixx in a corner!  This kind of blatant labeling is exactly what I am on about, power only derives from a mandate from the people!  Not from some quasi-aquatic... you know what I mean!  Making us out to be Pirates only makes us seem smaller and less dangerous than admitting the truth and their own complicity in that truth.  If the Empire Nation States were less dictatorial and more democratic then we wouldn't need to wander the darkness of low-sec but would be free to ply our trade in all of the space that is legally ours!  We are the sons of New Eden, you, me and everyone, brought down from the first Gate to settle and raise our families in this garden of plenty, this land is ours by right!  But over the centuries those that control us have dominated us by false promises and sinister lying, cheating and stealing of stuff that didn't need stolen.  Now they subjugate the masses for their own twisted corporate bloat, adding riches upon riches and flinging the excrement of their excess into the far corners of the universe where it festers and stinks and grows into Null Sec.

If that makes me a Pirate in your eyes then so be it!  I AM A PIRATE then, if being so makes me the boogie-man hiding under your rich fat bed then I accept your label and spit it right back at you.  I hope you choke on it.  And little puss filled sores open up on your face, sores so vile that no known ointment can alleviate the horrible itching pain you feel at all hours of the day.

Ask anyone, I'm a nice guy.  I love my wife and my family.  I raise award winning Meta-Meat Beasts on several pastural worlds, I like to fly my spaceships around and listen to music while I blow up other spaceships.  Does this make me a bad person?  I don't think so!!  But that's what they'd have you believe.  Hold me down and make quick and easy judgement calls on me, put me in a box with a sticky note on it that says 'Pirate' and forget about me.  That's what they want.  But they won't get it!  Not from this guy.

So I wrote Name Removed Because I Don't Remember back and told him this stuff.  I also mentioned that our Alliance Manifesto clearly states that we are violently ANTI Anti-Pirate so they should probably set us -10.  If they happen to also be role-players then they'd have two strikes against them.  Which is sad, since they hate the Amarrian Empire almost as much as I do.  Including their vassals CVA!  Don't even get me started.  Oh well.

Hopefully this means they'll come around trying to kill us and teach us a lesson.